


(You Had Me At) Hello

by AlyssiaInWonderland



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff and Smut, Literally just a phone sex AU thing, M/M, Phone Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-04
Updated: 2017-11-04
Packaged: 2019-01-29 06:54:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12625584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlyssiaInWonderland/pseuds/AlyssiaInWonderland
Summary: Spock works at a phone sex line centre as part of his research on human sexuality. Leonard is the caller.Or in which, Leonard is new to the whole 'phone sex' thing, but seems to do well at it anyway!Originally written for Spiced Peaches





	(You Had Me At) Hello

“Hello? Uh. Hi?”  
  
Spock sighed to himself; obviously this caller was not a regular user of phone-sex lines.  
  
“Hello. I am Spock. It is good to meet you.” He went for a gentle, friendly tone, to try and put the man at ease.

“Hi. I’m…” The man’s voice was gentle, a little quiet, and a lot southern.

“You do not need to tell me your name if you do not wish to.” He paused, considering how to open the conversation best. “How was your day?”  
  
“I thought this is a…uh…phone sex line? Aren’t I supposed to be sweet-talkin’ you?”  
  
“If you wish, certainly. However, I thought that you would be more amenable to casual conversation initially.”   
  
“Damn, I’m that obviously nervous, huh?”  
  
“You seem remarkably less so now.” Spock pointed out, allowing himself a small internal smile.

“It’s been a hell of a day.” The man answered the previous question, and Spock was pleased that he had read him correctly.  
  
“Oh?”  
  
“Aw, it’s nothin’ much. I just…couple years ago, my wife got custody of what seems like the whole damn planet, and she served some more goddamn papers about limiting my weekends with my kid. I’m a doctor, uh, I do the ER and there were a few rough cases that didn’t make it through. So I got myself a drink and called a damn phone sex line to let off some steam, for some godforsaken reason, and here we are.” He sounded equal parts embarrassed and awkward, and it was peculiarly endearing. “I don’t know why I told ya all that. Bet you didn’t see that all comin’ from a simple ‘how was ya day’.” He laughed a little, and despite the self-deprecation in it, the laugh was pleasant.  
  
“It is quite alright; there is no specific demographic that dominates our lines.” Spock answered, attempting to reassure him. “It certainly sounds like it has been a trying day.”  
  
“You can say that again!”  
  
“It certainly sounds like it has been a trying day.” Spock repeated, an actual smile twisting his lips as the laugh sounded again, this time in pure amusement.

“Damn literal idiot!” The words were a little insulting, but the tone was friendly, even affectionate. “Ya sound practically Vulcan.”  
  
“That would be because I am indeed half Vulcan.” Spock surprised himself by answering truthfully. “Though I would argue that Vulcans are simply logical to take words and their implications at face value. Is it not strange to use a phrase that calls for an action and yet not require it to be taken?”  
  
“It’s called a figure of speech, you-“ The man paused, laughing again. “Dammit. You were having me on, weren’t you? C’mon, you interpreted me literally on purpose.”  
  
“I do not know if I was ‘having you on’ as you so put it; I would not, however, object to ‘having you’.”  The mood changed abruptly from amusement, the banter smoothly sliding into innuendo, without Spock having to calculate the best path for the conversation.

“You’d like to ‘have me’, huh?” The man drawled, amusement still present in his tone despite the hitch in his breathing that betrayed his excitement.  
  
“If that were something you also desired, I would find it most agreeable.” Spock conceded.  
  
“Well, sure, can’t say as I wouldn’t find it agreeable, Spock.”  
  
“Your excessive use of negative statements is illogical.” Spock commented. “However, I cannot find it in myself to care, as it lengthened the time for which you spoke.” It was like his brain-to-mouth filter had broken, or the switch had been turned off; he wasn’t entirely sure why or where this was going, only that it felt interminable to cease the interaction. Typically, he would be planning several steps ahead of the conversation. Currently, he was trapped in the present, predominantly reactive. It was not an unpleasant sensation.

“You like my voice?” The man sounded genuinely surprised.  
  
“The timbre of your voice, and its accent, combine to create a most compelling experience.” Spock said, almost taken aback by how true it was.

“I’m sure ya say that to everyone.” He laughed, not seeming particularly distressed by the idea.  
  
“Vulcans do not lie.” Spock countered, his lips quirking in a smile once again. “Your voice elicits a definite pleasurable response in me, Doctor.”  
  
“Damn.” There was a pause. “So, you’d enjoy it if I talked about what I’d like to do with you?”  
  
“Yes.” Spock answered, simply. He knew that he was supposed to be the one leading the seduction, but nothing about this particular customer was usual. He liked the thought of being seduced; and that alone was remarkable.

“I bet you have pointed ears, if you’re part Vulcan, right, Spock?”  
  
“Affirmative.”  
  
“I’d love to kiss an’ bite those ears. Hear ya gasp, because they’re sensitive if my medical knowledge leads me right.” His voice was darkening, shading into a rougher tone that made Spock shiver along with the words. He could almost feel a phantom mouth, nibbling at his ears, and he sighed unconsciously.  
  
“You are correct.” He managed.

“I’d be sittin’ in your lap for that, so I could reach ya real easy. Then I’d take one of your hands, and kiss your fingers.”  
  
“Are you aware of the significance of-“  
  
“Yeah. Damn right I’m aware.” He was almost growling, and knowing that the Doctor did indeed intend to be lewd made Spock bite his lip, closing his eyes and imagining soft lips caressing his skin. “I’d kiss your fingers, and lick up them. Take ‘em in my mouth and suck. Might even graze ‘em lightly with my teeth every so often, just to keep ya alert.”  
  
Spock actually moaned aloud.  
  
“Damn, did you just-“ There was a pause, and the unmistakable rasp of a zip opening. “Is it alright if I-“  
  
“Yes.” Spock cut the man off, releasing his breath in a slight laugh. “This is a phone sex line; I would probably be offended should you not wish to.”   
  
“Well, I suppose that’s…logical.”   
  
“Indeed. As it would be for me to grip your hair and fuck your mouth with my fingers.” Spock licked his lips, grateful for the headset and privacy of the booth he worked in. There would be no mistaking the bulge in his trousers for anything but an erection, and while many of the operators did get off while working, he had never been one of them.

“Oh fuck!” The man moaned, and Spock smiled victoriously at the reaction his words had elicited. “I’d use my hands to tease at your nipples, distract you. Then I could get some lube so you could finger me, use those sensitive hands to get us both off.” His words were broken up by short gasps that twisted Spock’s gut with arousal.  
  
“I do not think I would let you simply get off on my fingers. I would open you up and make you ride me while I sit in my chair.” The tightness in his pants was becoming unbearable, and he was certain that his voice was becoming breathy with it.  
  
“I’d suck hickeys into your neck while I rode ya.” His voice was heavy with lust, and Spock’s hand twitched towards his waistband. It was only through a supreme effort of will that he could resist. “Put my fingers in your mouth to stop you from makin’ a sound while I ride your cock.”  
  
“Fuck.” Spock’s hand tightened on his thigh, enough that he was likely to bruise himself.  
  
“Like that idea, huh?” The man was unbearably smug, but Spock couldn’t quite mind when his head was swirling with want.

“I- I do.”  
  
“Jesus, you gettin’ off on this?”

“Yes. No. I…I am not touching myself.”  
  
“Well, how ‘bout this. Why don’t ya slip your hand inside your trousers and stroke yourself for me?” Spock honest to god moaned in response, his restraint warring with the increasing desire to give in. “You don’t gotta do it, but I sure think you’d enjoy it if ya let me talk until we both come, darlin’.”  
  
It was ultimately the endearment that did it. Spock slid a hand into his underwear, taking hold of his neglected cock and gasping at the blessed sensation. 

“Should it not be me doing the talking?” Spock managed, closing his eyes to fully enjoy the feeling of his hands on his dick. The sensitivity of his hands made the process even more illicit than he understood it to be for humans. “I am the one who is supposed to be seducing you, after all.”  
  
“Spock, I’m sure as hell gettin’ off on tellin’ ya what I’d do, and if you like it, ain’t it more like everyone’s a winner?” He laughed.

“That is-“ Spock paused to take in a ragged breath. “Eminently logical, Doctor.”  
  
“Are you doin’ what I said, sugar? Jerkin’ off at your desk?”  
  
“I- yes.”  
  
“Oh,” The man moaned, and Spock was gratified to hear just how wrecked of a sound it was. “Fuckin’ damn. You’re so good for me, you’re doin’ so good, sweetheart, jus’ keep goin’.” The combination of gentleness and commanding was swiftly breaking past Spock’s controls, and he moaned again. “I’d make ya touch me while I rode your cock.” He said, almost matter-of-fact. “The dick’s like a hotwire to tighten your ass, ya know that? You bringin’ me off’d have a damn good outcome for the both of us.”  
  
“I do not think your fingers would be enough to silence me at that point.” Spock spoke both because it was beyond him not to do so, and because he wanted to hear the reaction, wanted to see how incendiary the words would be. 

“I’d want to hear ya, love the sounds ya make. Want to make you shout an’ beg for more, faster.”   
  
“You will have to try harder than that to make me shout,” Spock wasn’t entirely sure if that were true, but he continued nonetheless. “I am part Vulcan; our control is legendary.”  
  
“Well so are my damn hands.” The man said, his voice abruptly darker. “And I’d take your hair and pull your head back, bite ya neck and fuck your mouth with ‘em.”  
  
“Oh.” Spock gasped for breath. “Perhaps I-“ He stifled a moan, his hand stroking across his cock even faster, physically unable to stop or open his eyes anymore. “Underestimated you.”  
  
“That’s fuckin’ right.” The man sounded victorious, and Spock was struck by the sudden urge to overwhelm him just as much as he had been.  
  
“I would use my free hand to stroke your areolae.”  
  
“Oh god,” His voice broke off for a moment, and even through the blinding pleasure Spock savoured it. “Aw, hell, I’m gonna – ah – come. Spock!”

“Oh…” Spock let out a ragged moan, the delicious sensation of orgasm building, pooling at the base of his stomach.

“Come for me darlin’.”

Spock shoved his shirt-sleeve into his mouth as he came to stifle the cry, making a mess of his shirt and chest. The other man’s moans were uninhibited, and despite the aftershocks of orgasm he could feel his cock wanted to twitch again at the sounds.

“Well,” The other man said, a few seconds later. “I think that mighta been one of the best goddamn sweet-talkin’s I ever had in my life.” He paused. “Or given, t’be fair.”  
  
“It was…most satisfactory.”  
  
“Most satisfactory? It was fuckin’ sensational, an’ you know it!”

“As I said, Doctor.”  
  
“That ain’t what I recall you sayin’. In my world, ‘satisfactory’ jus’ means ‘not terrible’.”  
  
“It was most definitely ‘not terrible’.” Spock smiled, tiredly. He knew he should end the call, but found himself wishing that he could choose not to. He didn’t even know the man’s name, and something in him strongly desired to. “I would like to thank you for choosing to use our lines tonight. If you would like to fill out our online feedback survey, it would be most appreciated.”  
  
“Uh, sure. Feedback survey. Got it.” He sounded suddenly more uncertain. “Suppose I should go now, huh.” He paused for a moment. My name’s uh, Leonard McCoy, by the way. Jus’…in case ya…want ta know.”

The dial tone sounded before Spock could respond.

* * *

“Hello?” Spock felt an uncharacteristic anxiety. “Uh. Hi?”

“This is Doctor McCoy, how may I help you?” It was the same voice. Masked by professionalism, and the southern tones were hidden a little compared to how he sounded in the heat of the moment. But it was unmistakably the right Leonard McCoy.

“I was hoping to talk with you. That is, if you do not object.”  
  
“Who is this? I’m a Doctor, not a counsellor!”  
  
“It is Spock.”  
  
Silence rang for five point four long seconds.  
  
“You looked up my number?” Leonard sounded utterly stunned. “I…you looked up my number?”  
  
“You are no more correct for having said so twice, Leonard.” Spock replied, allowing himself a moment to be pleased now that it seemed his call was not unwelcome.

“Why you smug- I should-“ He sputtered.  
  
“You should come for drinks after your shift is complete, Doctor. I believe that is an appropriate way to ask a human on a date?”  
  
“None of this is appropriate!” He protested.  
  
“Am I to understand that you do not wish to come on a date with me?”  
  
“No!” He said, hastily. “I-“ He paused, running a hand through his hair distractedly. “I’d quite like to. I left you my name for a reason, I just never expected you to actually come find me.”  
  
“I hope to.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Come.” Spock elaborated. “Several times, in fact. After the drinks.”

“You can’t seduce me now, I’m at work, dammit!”  
  
“Well,” Spock smiled. “So was I.”

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for Spiced Peaches, and while I'm not always that great at smut, I feel like this went ok!
> 
> Hope it was enjoyable, and as ever, comments and kudos feed my dark soul!!! <3


End file.
